2020 was…a year. It was that way for a lot of us.
In the midst of trying to wrap my mind around the spiritual abuse being done to me (didn’t know it at the time yet), increasing racial violence, incredibly poor national handling of the global pandemic, etc., etc.,
I wrote this.
I wrote it in one shot, and I’m giving it to you without edits.
It honestly captures really well where I was at in October 2020.
Some things have changed for the better since then (praise God), but I’m still working through other parts of everything I was going through.
I share this piece because I want people to care.
No, like, actually care.
To care enough to get activated and stay activated. To care enough to make hard changes that are good, right, healthy, and just. To care enough to quit intellectualizing everything and act.
Because today, in 2023, what has actually changed?
I sprinted as fast as I could.
The dim streetlights glowed nonchalantly, as if they were trying to bring a measure of calm to the situation.
I could hear my own heart pounding in my head as I kept going with all the energy I had left.
I muttered to myself the address the dying man had pleaded with me to run to so I wouldn’t forget, “35 Madison St., 35 Madison St., 35 Madison St.”
Maybe I also wanted to repeat the address so I wouldn’t focus so much on the dying man’s face—his dark skin, the sweat mingled with tears…and the eyes. His eyes were pools of agony and terror. Totally understandable considering what had happened to him, but I was more haunted by what was missing from his eyes.
There wasn’t any shock. Instead, there seemed to be a resignation. Those eyes echoed a sheep that had accepted its fate as it was led to the slaughterhouse.
I shook the thought out of my head and focused on getting to the right house: “35 Madison St.”
Finally, I saw the warm glow of the streetlight shine on Madison St. "Yes!”, I thought to myself. I took a sharp right and found a last burst of energy. “29…31…33…35 Madison St.!”
I bolted up the stairs and pounded on the door.
“Please, open up! Your friend is dying!”, I shouted.
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